Violent Emotions*

Weird days go by. Nothing happens and everything remains the same day after day. Emotions fluctuate violently. A minute, an hour, a day is what it takes to experience those emotions that rule a life in which the person wants to take complete control. Around me, everything is happening to everyone, and it may be just life happening or some signals disguised under better known skins. When one of my stars lost its brightness two months ago, the learning that it left me was to be spontaneous and act; some days later I did. Then, I traveled fastly with a shooting star that I know is still out there, but I can't see it. Are we going through the same?.
Everyone has to see for its own and best interest, and what has interested me so far, it hasn't been me, even though I did think so. I have been interested in others, therefore, I have spent my time trying to get to know them better. Some I still see them, some not, but what matters here is that my contribution to their lives worked, and that is the only thing I am certain about of what I did.
I can't erase the good and bad moments I have lived, and once again that saying makes sense: "things happen for a reason". I have no clue today, but if I hold on to these rocky roads I'm going through in my life, I will find out. Writing is my catharsis, or maybe it's the way that I will be able to look back and understand. My memory can't be trusted, for I could not recall well the emotions experienced at a specific time. I'm on my own pursuit of happiness. I am aware that is not a thing to be found somewhere, but I wanted or believed I would find it really away from here. Maybe I will or maybe I won't, but I'm trying to hold on because there are some days in which I have hope, and I believe that things will be better.
I haven't been strong enough, for I have crumbled too many times, and even though I've wanted to let go all of those times, I've stood up and kept on going.